You are currently viewing Friends…how to make and keep them!         post 39

Friends…how to make and keep them! post 39

Friends...

Recently, I posted photos of a ladies brunch that I hosted at our farm, on a facebook page I follow. (pictured below)

As I read and responded to the comments, a similar comment was shared by “many” people. Thinking back, this comment is repeated on almost all of the posts I share.

How do you have so many friends? Or, I wish I had that many friends. Or, I don’t even know that many people! Or, you sure are blessed with so many friends.

This has really been on my mind lately. I really do have a lot of friends how did that happen?

Before I give you some ideas to add more friends to your lives…let’s look at how my friendships began.

Girl Scouts...

Of course, this was back in the day, but it was one of the biggest influences on my life. The girls in our troop, were from “the neighborhood and grade school you attended”

Everything we learned was geared toward including all of the troop. The songs were about being open to new friendships…remember the old camp song “Make new friends, but keep the old, one is silver and the others gold”

We were part of a team of sorts, planning together toward fun events and goals.

I am 68 years old, I am still friends with most of the girls I was in Brownies with! My Brownie leader, Mrs. Harwood is still living in a town close by.

Her daughter, my friend Linda, still makes time to visit when she comes home from Texas.

We ran into each other in Kohls this summer, and had the clerk take a picture, lol!

Even though we hardly ever see each other. When we are together, it’s like we were never apart. Maybe you have a long lost friend from your grade school days.

I encourage you to look them up. History between people is an automatic connection!

Neighbors...

Our farm is in an urban area. We live right on a bike path and kind of busy road.

At age 65, I started raising chickens, with the thoughts of selling the extra eggs to help pay for the feed.

That summer we put up a little stand with vegetables and some fresh eggs in a cooler.

One of the bike path runners, bought a dozen eggs and found my contact information inside. She looked me up on facebook and started following my posts.

One day she sent me a message, saying she was a neighbor and egg customer, and loved how I displayed my front bay window. Would I except a friend request from her?

That was two years ago, after I excepted the friend request, we followed each others lives and just seemed “to click”

This summer I decided we needed to meet in person, I wanted to get to know her better and introduce her to my friends.

So we met for coffee at McDonalds, and talked for over three hours, lol!

She attended my barn luncheon, met my friends and fit in like a glove….this is Karen.

So once again, I encourage you to make the first step toward a friendship…even if it seems awkward.

Karen said her family said “Mom your going to meet a total stranger?” 

At a safe place like McDonalds, after two years of correspondence…and a neighbor, why not?  

...but keep the old

High School…some of the best friendships are formed there. Do you still see any of your friends from high school?

Some of my dearest friends and I went to high school together. That was “50” years ago! We still love each other so much! Our fifty year high school reunion is coming up in 3 weeks.

Have you ever gone to your high school reunion? You SHOULD! You could rekindle the friendships that have been missing in your lives.

Here are a few girls that came to my barn luncheon, we all went to high school together and graduated in 1973, lol!

Bunko...

Have you ever played Bunko? It’s a card game that you play with a partner, switching to different tables as the night progresses. It’s really fun and easy to visit while playing.

After playing it a a party I went to, I decided to start a group of my own.

There were people in my neighborhood that I wanted to get to know better that I wanted to invite.

This was the year my son was in first grade. Volunteering in his room as a teachers assistant, I connected with his teacher, Dianne. As he was advancing to second grade, I didn’t want to loose contact with her and invited her to join the Bunko club I was establishing.

Also a few other friends, that didn’t know each other, could invite a few other gals. That would make a group of 12, three tables of 4 ladies.  We met every month, taking turns hosting…for over 10 Years!

Beta Sigma Phi...

No…I didn’t go to college. This is not a college sorority.

Years ago, I sold baskets, demonstrating at home parties. One party was a fund raiser for a local chapter of Beta Sigma Phi, a social soroity.

Never hearing of such a thing, the ladies explained it was founded in the 1930’s and started as a social outlet for ladies.

Starting on a basic level and building your “self” to be full of social graces, learning experiences, community volunteering, and friendship.

I couldn’t believe there was something out there…like grown up Girl Scouts, lol!

A few weeks after the party was over, the local chapter, voted to ask me to be a pledge in their group!  I was shocked and honored!

For fifteen years, I never missed a meeting or social event! We traveled as a group, on a long weekend once a year. For several years we had fund raisers, scrimped and saved, and took a trip out east for a week!

The memories from that group are dear to my heart. After our chapter disbanded, I didn’t want to loose touch with a few of the girls that had become my sweet friends.

The social sorority “Beta Sigma Phi” has chapters all over the world, look it up if you are interested in joining!

The Pink Cupboard...

For a few years I owned a vintage goods/gift shop called “The Pink Cupboard”. Renting space to a group of vendors in an old downtown building was an adventure.

The first girl to rent a booth from me was, Renie.  She was  close to my heart, then and now!

We all worked together as a big family to haul furniture from auctions, host bus loads of tourists, throw celebrations and more.

When I closed my store. I didn’t want to loose those girls from my life!  

So the left over sorority girls, and the left over Pink Cupboard girls, now form…Mending Club (Mending friendships, mending hearts and minds)

Girls from their 40’s through their 70’s. All together for a common bond, friendship.

We take turns making a nice dinner, every other month. We’ve traveled together, cried together and celebrated together.

The photo above is “First time grandma shower” for Theresa (tall girl in the middle)

Book Club...

I’m embarrassed to admit this…but I’m going to.

When I was thirty five years old, one of the dearest friends I have, Diane, (who I met and became friends with at a home basket party, lol!) asked me to form a book club with her.

The last book I read was to my children when they were in grade school! The realization that I had NEVER read a book as an adult, stunned me! How could this happen? I was embarrassed and kind of ashamed.

But I thought, well, why not? Just because I hadn’t been a “reader” didn’t mean I couldn’t start! Sure, I said. Let’s put a list of girls together and get started.

Our little book club, changed my life in so many ways. One of the first books we read was “The Red Tent”. That was the first time reading a book that I felt totally taken away by the story. The writer was so descriptive you could almost smell and see the scenes.

The girls in that first book club, lead to meeting their friends…that lead to Garden Club.

 

My best advice to make new friends…is to go to your local library. Get a library card and sign up for a book club!

You will have at least 8 brand new friends!

To discuss and share ideas from a group read book is so satisfying!

Be brave, start your new life.

Final tips...

I’m trying to teach my grandchildren to be social and friendly.

Hosting a family friendly Halloween Party for the grandkids and their friends, over ten years ago, has morphed into a full fledged Annual Carnival and Hayride. With over 65 people attending,  each family bringing a dish to pass.

Here are some of the kids, then and now, lol!

Now I have become friends with the parents of these kids. So many of my grown daughter’s friends are close to our whole family.

Be a friend...share a friend

This again is my dear friend Diane ( the gal I met at the basket party and we started book club together). Diane is a connector, she has a public relations position and meets lots of people every day.

She introduced me to one of my newest friends, Teresa, we met through Diane at a Ladies Christmas Tea.

Don’t ever turn down an invitation to anything, lol! You never know who you will “click” with and become friends.

Final "Friend" Tips...

Making friends can be hard…but here is something I’ve been thinking about.

If you have one friend, (we’ll call her Sue)  maybe from work, school, church, etc., tell her you are trying to expand your “friend” list.

If Sue will think of someone (that you do not know, we’ll call her Jennifer) and Jennifer will invite someone neither of you know…an so on.

Until you have 8 girls, each girl only will know one or two girls.

You could start a lunch club, a book club, a movie night club, a craft club, a mom’s club, a retiree club, a bunko group….the sky is the limit. 

Be a hostess...open your home and heart

Here are some pictures of things I’ve hosted, from cookie exchanges to garden parties.

There's always a few "besties"...

Everyone needs friends, there are always a few that are by your side…thick and thin!

Here are two of the sweetest people I know…the ones I can count on to help with anything I ask, months ahead while planning…to the last minute details.

Sandi and Elaine. I love them today and everyday.

No matter how old you are, there are a lot of sweet memories left to make in your life.

Women need friends…go grab some!

Fondly, Sandy

This Post Has 6 Comments

  1. Carol Francis

    I love your blog. I am a neighbor and would love to meet you. Please accept my Facebook friend request 😊

    1. Sandy Brewer

      Hi Carol! Hello neighbor! I’ll look for your name and try to put a friend request through. Trying to keep up with social media is a full time job, lol! But you can never have too many friends! Thanks for following our crazy life as we try to become farmers for retirement, lol
      Fondly, Sandy

  2. Sally Conklin

    Sandy wow you worked very hard to put this list together. Thank you for sharing it with me.
    Friend from the past – school, maybe Girl Scouts,
    Sally Conklin

    1. Sandy Brewer

      Hi Sally! I’m trying to put together a Girl Scout Troop reunion for our old troop! Hope you are coming to our 50th class reunion…we could talk about it!
      Fondly, Sandy

  3. Pam Epperson (Merkle)

    Hi Sandy. I’m glad we reconnected at the reunion

    1. Sandy Brewer

      Hello Pam! Me too! I had so much fun!
      Fondly, Sandy

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